Before I became a mother, I worked full-time as a lawyer. A litigator. Going to court and taking depositions involves a certain amount of stress, although for the record being a mother is by far the more difficult job. During my time litigating, I kept a picture in my desk drawer that I had torn from the pages of Country Living magazine. It is the picture of the kitchen window above. When I was particularly stressed, I would open my drawer and look at that picture and it would calm me. I could imagine standing in front of that sink, barefoot in the summertime, watching out the window while the children I longed for ran and played in the grass. It was a dream place for me and God knew. He knew every detail.
I don’t remember looking at my “picture window” the last year I worked at my firm. That was the year I was pregnant with Wynn. There isn’t anything quite like feeling your baby stretch and hiccup inside of you to keep you grounded and focused on the important things. I guess you could say that my picture window came to dwell inside of me and I forgot all about the glossy dog-eared picture I’d torn from the magazine.
After Wynn was born and we had moved into our rental house, I spent a Sunday afternoon cleaning out my office at the law firm. I stumbled on “the picture window” at the bottom of a drawer. My breath caught in the back of my throat. Apparently sometime in the prior year I had forgotten the specifics of the architecture of that window.
But our God never forgets the details.
He goes ahead of us, He fights for us, and He prepares a place for us. (Deuteronemy 1:30; Matthew 28:1-8).
That Sunday afternoon in my old office, I held a ragged magazine page that had been forgotten at the bottom of a drawer and looked right at the very kitchen that God had led our family to when He called us out of our New Old House and toward the Harvest.
It is a pretty exact replica of the kitchen in our rental house.
You can see for yourself.
I can’t tell you how many times I questioned our decision to sell our house and move and whether I had really heard God’s whisper and interpreted it correctly. Was I lost? Was I where I was supposed to be? Were we following the Lord or had we misread the map entirely? Finding that magazine page that Sunday afternoon was a true God-Stop moment in my life. He spoke to me and I knew I was in the right place. I knew He was right beside me. He had gone ahead and prepared my place.
What can I even say about the fact that I am holding my precious baby, standing in front of that kitchen window?
“What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived, the things God has prepared for those who love Him- these are the things God has revealed to us by His Spirit. 1 Corinthians 2:9.